“You mean they found you?” he asked, his voice stern.
“It’s alright, I outran them,” she answered breathing hard.
“Oh, no. That’s just the thing. Once they find you, you never stop running.”
“What do you mean?” her eyes were very wide now, her face very pale.
“I mean, they will hunt you down forever… until you’re dead, or the world ends.” He grabbed her arm fiercely and spun her around. “Run!”
Tears filled her eyes. “But that can’t…can’t be…”
“I warned you. Now, run… run before they find you again! And before they find me.”
She turned and fled.
--- You should have seen my Mom’s face when she came home from the Christmas party. The kitchen counter was completely cleared off, every...
I enjoyed this one, though it lost its dramatic flair a bit in the middle for some reason. I think the "..." might've imposed too much pause into my mind than was natural for the urgent scenario.
ReplyDeleteIt's pretty minor, though, and otherwise very well done. :)
I actually had three times as many ellipses when I originally wrote it. Someone reviewed it for me and took most of the them out. But it might be a good idea to remove them all.
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting!