An Oftentimes Fool

If there was grass anymore it would be soft here.

If there was a sun anymore it would be golden silk on the horizon.

If there was life anymore there would be fireflies dancing like tiny fallen stars.

So many days wasted banking on the empty promise of tomorrow.

Oftentimes I would let the day die and the moon rise unnoticed as I toiled at something unimportant.

“Not today, brother”, I’d say. Maybe tomorrow, next weekend, another day. 

Well, tomorrow’s come, and where are you?

Dead.

And the follies of the good old days are a knife inside my chest.

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For You

We found you, of course.

We always do.

Your pasty grey hands reach out, desperate.

Begging for life.

Don’t you know you’re already cursed?

But, no.  You’re fortunate.  

How I loathe those who saved me. 

Who stole me, branded me worthy. 

Sewed my skin to this green, green world.

Who seared my flesh so I could never be free.

They’ve beat me, they’ve won. 

Don’t let them beat you too.

So as they hand me this torch, trust me.

As they douse you, don’t scream.

You’ll be free now, I promise.

I’ll do this, yes.

I’ll do this for you

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Searching

I look the computer message over once as I pull on my gear

Survivors: unknown

Enemy Forces: 2

We file out of the bunker. It’s the middle of the night.

No stars. No moon. No dark.

Just a world of empty green.

We spread out over the hillside.

And just in case my eyes can’t see, my little box is searching. It’s only bluish right now, but soon, I’ll see red. Little red blurs caught in a constricting trap.

     We’ll find them.  We always do.

Then my box will show blazing red and my eyes will see nothing but white.

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Mask

they tell us that the mask is to help us breathe

to block out the ash

to protect our faces from the radiation

but I wonder

if maybe it’s so we can’t see the fear on each other’s faces

if maybe it’s so we don’t know which of our comrades torched the screaming family

if maybe it’s so we’ll forget that once we had our own faces

I wonder

do they know that I remember?

that behind this mask I’m dreaming of the day they will incinerate

in these same flames that stole me and left my brother to die

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We, the Faceless

Forty five black radiation suits filling up a table.

Eating the same brothy slush that hardly fills our stomachs.

But soldier, don’t question.

Don’t look up. Or left or right.

Just down. At the slush.

Shovel it into your mouth. Force it down your throat.

Don’t think about the people, about the children, you’ll execute tomorrow.

Don’t think about their screams.

Just eat.

Because you’re one. One in forty five, in a hundred, in a thousand.

You’re lucky to be alive.

The alarms go off.

We all stand.

Pull on our masks.

And just like that the world goes green.

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Survivors

They’re haggard, dirty, ragged.  But they’re alive.

This place is made of scraps, whatever they could salvage.

But they’re alive.

They lay us on the floor.

Wash ash and crusted blood from my skin. Drip water into my mouth till my tongue is loosened and my throat is clear.

The little girl comes, touches my face again.

“You’re here to save us from the aliens, right?” she whispers.

“They’re humans.” I whisper back.

“They have green eyes.”

“It’s night vision.”

“But you’re going to stop them?”

And what do I say? How can I tell her?

We’re never gonna win.

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Ready to Die

Out of water

Out of food

No survivors

And no rescue

The two of us, we’re the last of our team.  I don’t know who fell first, but we’re both on the ground. Panting.  Looking up at a broken sky with ash swimming around like dying fishes.  It must be August, the heat is scorching.

I can feel my throat closing.

So thirsty.

My breathing slows.  My eyes close.

Ready to die.

I don’t ever want to wake up.

But something presses into my cheek.

And doesn’t stop.

I open my eyes. Blink twice.

There's a child poking my face.

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Losing Language

“God help us all.”

These words I whisper whenever my throat isn’t full of ash.

Tonight I whisper it twice.

Because tonight we lost another.

My comrade, my friend.

They caught him,

soaked his camo in gasoline,

and dropped a match beneath his feet.

His bloody screams keep ringing through my head.

I watched him burn away.

I choked on the ash. Vomited. Choked again.

Out of hope and out of faith.

running out of words to say

running out of the desire to speak them

I tell them over the radio with halting words like toddler speech.

It’s over. 

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Three

I count my strides as we run.

Almost there.

So close.

“Get down!”

I turn. The blast hits me like a wall.

Ash and dirt and someone’s blood.  I wipe it off my face.

Ten.

A second explosion. We’re even less prepared.

Eight.

We scramble for cover, crouch in the ruins.

“Where are they?”

No one knows.

Then the clouds lets loose. Metal ricochets, finds a target.

Seven

Six

Five

A shard bites into my shoulder. I fight the welling scream.

No noise, no sound.

Lungs hardly moving.

Wait.

Maybe they can’t see…

Another blast,

another spray of blood.

Three.

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Sixteen Soldiers

Sixteen soldiers

Spread out on a hill

Looking for survivors

Where the dead are burning still

Sixteen soldiers

Going street by street

Searching for the living

In the place where dead men meet

Sixteen soldiers

Sifting through remains

Seeking someone, anyone

With blood still in their veins

Sixteen soldiers

Standing in a row

Staring at an orange sky

It ends today, we know

Black suits, green eyes

Guns up, faces down

Three big flashes

Bullets through the town

One falls, two fall

The ground is in the air

Ashes ashes, we all fall down

Thirteen soldiers

Left to carry on

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I'm In

“How’s the pain?”

Fine.

“You’re lucky you survived.”

But my brother, he didn’t.

“What do you think? Will you join us?”

All eyes turn to me.

A dozen pairs or so, waiting for an answer

I’m all too ready to give.

“Yes”

If only just to kill those faceless murderers.

I’ve joined the battle brigade.

We ship out today. Way past time for second thoughts.

I’m a soldier now, being sent out to kill.

But who am I kidding?

I’m just a boy from a lost town watching moths dance in the summer breeze.

I’m not ready for this hell.

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The Only

I wake up screaming. Alarms are going off.

I’m shivering, nearly naked, on a steel table.

Needles protrude from my arms.  I pluck them out.

But when I try to sit, I scream again.

Pain rips through my chest beneath a bloody bandage. I can hardly breathe.

Two men in ash colored camo rush in.

They shut off machines, reinsert needles.

I try to fight them back, but pain still echoes through me.

I gasp like I am drowning.

I can hardly form the words.

“Where’s my brother?”

They look at each other.

"I'm sorry, you are the only survivor."

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Hands of Blue

I force my eyes open. Why so heavy?

Blue lights pointing down. Why so bright?

My face is tight. A mask strapped across my mouth, foggy with breath.

Further down, blue hands move. Blurry with speed

I blink.  Then I feel it

The knife beneath my ribs

Then a hundred knives arching across my back.

a thousand needles rammed into my bones

a million voices screaming through my ears.

Try to scream.  Can’t

Try to move. Restrained.

Four blue hands pin me down.

One blue hand drives a needle into my arm.

gasp. choke.

see spots.

blink.

            black.

blink.

           nothing.

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I Tried.

Faceless. Two green discs where eyes should be.

Shapeless.  Black radiation suits shimmering in the firelight.

Heartless.  Torching prisoners till they’re ash.

I’m pinned to the ground. Hot dirt scalding my cheek.

Human charcoal in my ear.

They’ve got my brother.

They press a blowtorch against his head.

My captor holds me tighter, forcing me to watch.

Then a hundred voices scream. Blue against the fire.

Bullets rain. My captor’s eyes go black.

And  I’m running for my brother.

Bullets hiss around me.  They know not who to strike.

Searing red

Knees buckle.

I’ve caught some metal in my chest.

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The Outskirts of Town

This is the place where they’re piled.

Bodies shriveled and scorched.

Missing fingers, eyes, and faces. 

This is the place where they kill them.

Line them up and burn them.

Melting skin right off the bone.

This is the place where they’ve lead me.

Following my brother.

His capturers soon will torch him.

This is the place where I find him.

He’s chained down to a post.

He’s bleeding from his mouth.

He screams now as I touch him

His arm’s already burned.

Too loud. They’ve heard.

His chains won’t come undone.

They’re coming.

They’re coming to burn us both.

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