His eyes were fiercely shining as he spun around, the gun pointing forward.
“What do you want?” he shouted.
His breaths came in rapid heaves, and the beads of perspiration gathered in rivers on his forehead.
He swallowed hard and turned again, keeping his back to the wall.
“I know you are there,” He screamed hoarsely. “Show yourself!”
Silence.
Suddenly a loud clanging began on one side of the warehouse and moved across the ceiling. One by one, the glaring lights went out and all was dark.
He was breathing harder. Bang! A trigger had released. And all was silent.
--- You should have seen my Mom’s face when she came home from the Christmas party. The kitchen counter was completely cleared off, every...
woah.... I haven't been on your blog in a while... wow
ReplyDeletethat is a very well written drabble!!! The description is really good!!!
Thank you!!
ReplyDeleteAnd don't worry Rae, I posted all five of the new posts today.
It was fairly suspenseful, but actually I found the thrill here somehow unfitting for a drabble. Maybe it is because you tried to fit too much of the time-line? Maybe if you focused more on the moment where the lights go out, you might have more room for detail and suspense.
ReplyDeleteHmmm....good point. I will look into that.
ReplyDelete